Have you read the best selling novel Twilight? A lot of people are going crazy over Edward and Bella. What does this have to do with life coaching? Read on to find out.

Bella Swan

Bella is the heroin of the series. She is bright, shy, insecure, intelligent, quiet, clumsy, and beautiful. The book begins with Bella moving into the town of forks to live with her dad because her mom have to move a lot because of her step dad’s job. On her first day of school Bella sees Edward and without meaning to she seems pulled into a trance, she can’t help her self he has this magnetic presence. Despite the danger and warning signs Bella goes for Edward. Let us pretend that Bella is our heart.

Edward Cullen

Oh my gosh!!! Everyone is gushing! He really is handsome anyone can admit that. Mysterious, is what every girls dream and yet… In turmoil because of his undeniable gravitation towards Bella, Edward fights an inner demon: Himself. He distinguishes between his passion for Bella and his appetite for her. Successfully he is able to choose to be with her without harming her. Equipped with mind reading powers it is appropriate for us to say that Edward represents our minds.

Forks

Gloomy, rainy and quiet little town forks is our lives. The rain is the constant trials in our lives just as it is an annoyance to Bella.

The Exercise

With all our assumptions let us make an analysis. Looking for excitement in our other wise boring lives we delve hungrily into the story and see ourselves as Bella. What we fail to realize is that once in the history of our lives we were in fact and  might even be “Bella” right now. Why is it that people always fall short of appreciating their lives? Instead they put stock on fiction. They want to be Bella because they believe she lives an exciting life. Just like we let other people tell us what to do. Remember the part where in James used an old video tape of Bella to lure her into the dance studio? That’s you! Despite warning signal from Edward you still go thru things which know will put you into trouble.

Then there’s Edward, constantly battling with himself. That’s you also. Our lives are a constant battle with ourselves. We battle with laziness, being tired, being hurt, and pretty much everything else. What we fail to realize is that if we don’t like forks then we can leave anytime we want to. See the thing is, if we keep on leaving all we do is transfer a lot. Life is not playing the cards you’re dealt with, its making the cards you were given win!

If Forks is gloomy, instead of going surfing, garden! If you don’t find contentment in this, sit and ponder. What do you really want? What do you feel? What if you have no way of getting put of forks, what will you do? We are so out of touch with reality that we forget to touch base with the most basic things in our lives that we forget what’s right in front of us.

Life coaching makes us correlate, internalize, and really get into ourselves. They make us do certain activities in order to provoke us into action. It like when you’re angry and you do something spontaneously.

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Happiness is the unending quest in which humans give their eyes and teeth for. A person has never reached true success if he has never felt real happiness. As a matter of fact the declaration of independence states, that happiness and the pursuit there off is man’s in alienable right. Meaning it is a god given right.

Why Do We Have to Be Happy?

People say that life is complicated enough without having to be moody or sad every single day of your life. According to science elation triggers hormones that are essential for proper metabolic function and well being. The happy feeling also brings about the positive side of a person. Which ever premise you choose, it is absolutely important for a person to feel happiness in his lifetime.

Reality Check

In reality however, poverty, stress, violence, competition, and oppression is all around us. In Africa and other third world countries we see people dying of hunger, we see those in power abuse and beat down people to gain a foot ahead of their own country men. We see everything around us, but we fail to look within ourselves. Chances are your one of the thousands if not millions of people taking antidepressants.

Actually statistics say that 20% of Americans take antidepressant, and overdose of MAOI’s are not uncommon. The American Psychological Association asserts that children 14 and above will start having depressive episodes at least ones a year until the age of 30. Sadness leaves a profound effect on the human body and spirit. Humans tend to lean towards negativity because it tends to carry more weight that happiness. The unfortunate thing is that scientifically deep rooted sadness is the underlying cause for diseases such as, chronic heart failure, cerebrovascular accidents, apnea, and migraine.

Coaching vs. Therapy

It is important to prevent rather than cure. That is why when the first signs of restlessness ensue it is betting to bring in a life coaching expert. Therapists focus on past events, to analyze the present emotional, and mental condition of the people. They dig deep into the darkest corners of a person’s mind to find the root of unhappiness. Life coaches however focus on the present. Usually when a person feels the first nagging doubt of sadness the cause is immediately within reaching distance.

Mind Power

Life coaching uses the power of the mind to promote a positive effect on a person’s life. The mind is a powerful thing. It knows, it feels and it aggravates a person into action.

Pursuing happiness is a mental effort.

Actualization is achieved thru realization. A person is better able to see the road when he knows where he is going. It is not easy, although nothing ever is but with the aid of a life coach and the program a person is better able to focus because there is guidance and mentoring.

As much as a life coach wants to help you achieve your full potential and are happy there are limitations as to the scope of duties a life coach can perform. A life coach is not psychologically educated. Therefore they are not equipped with the expertise to treat a mentally and emotionally distraught person who is on the verge of utter hopelessness. If this is the case then it is better to seek medical help.

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Men and Women seek eternal happiness. Some people say their fulfillment lie with success in career, family, relationships, and pets. At the end of the day however, when you lie in bed awake can you truly say that you are happy? How many of us can say that we are truly euphoric with the way our lives have turned out?

Suffering and Us

Anguish arises from the disconnection of our thoughts and emotion from the realities of life. Restlessness is the root of all evil. We look at our discontentment and then view the outside world, but what we fail to realize is that like sorrow discontent is rooted within ourselves. Yet, we have never bothered to investigate or question our thoughts, our reasons for feeling uneasy. Time and time again, people try to feed their vexation with jumping from one thing to another, always failing to correlate that although intangible discontentment is not just a feeling it is a state of mind.

With the birth of everything Zen and spiritual one spiritual guru said that when you grind a knife against a grinding wheel sparks will fly; that is the nature of friction. People argue with themselves because they weigh whether to follow their heart or their mind. In end however people either jump into the fire or stay where they are. What decisions should a person follow when it comes to love?

Love On The Sleeve

When you’re in love you get caught up in the moment. That exhilarating feeling when you see the person you love; the butterflies in your tummy when you kiss. It really is wonderful. The bam! You get into an argument or one or the other does something wrong and then you are embittered. So you go to a life coach because you are at a lost.

The thing about life coaching is that coaches can’t tell you what to do, they can’t make you feel better. They won’t be able to take some of the pain out. What they can do however is make you internalize. Cry as much as you can and realize just how you feel and then go from there.

Mind On The Bend

You’re probably thinking how can making you feel the hurt help you? It is the process of knowing yourself that helps you. Recognizing how you feel and think will enhance your ability to rationalize and internalize. Despite the disparity of the mind and the heart, the two are more intertwined than we think. Feeling and emotions just like thoughts are all processed in the brain. The heart is a muscle. IT is the core of humanity because it pumps blood. Feelings are processed through the mind and not the heart.

Peace

It seems that war is afoot and it’s the heart versus the mind. It’s supposed to be a synergy. After all when you try to analyze how you feel you use your mind and when you think of the pros and cons of any decision you factor in feelings. Life coaching problems of the heart is not about helping you pick the right decisions. Life coaching will provoke you into action. What kind of action? Only you will know.  So in the end we must find the balance of feeling and thoughts when it comes to love.

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Do you feel like you’re on a slump lately? Most of the time we want so many things that we don’t know which road to take; more often than not we find out that if we put our mind into it we can actually succeed in numerous career choices. This new found realization makes things even more complicated than it already is.

Being able to find out which things we are passionate about is very difficult because we desire a lot of things. When we reach the pinnacle of success we think that we will want nothing more, and yet when we get there things get even murkier and murkier that we eventually loose our sense of self completely.

Just Like Alice

Success is not the basis of finding ones self. Advice is useless, because no matter how many people you talk to if you don’t heed what they say then it means nothing. What’s more other people’s opinions are one sided because they do not know the entire situation. Only you have the power because you are the one who experience your life from every degree and angle.

Coaching In A Nutshell

Contrary to popular belief life coaching is not like therapy. Life coaches are not like psychologists either. Life coaches acts as radical catalysts to provoke you into action. Life coaching is an alliance; a synergy between the coach and the person being coached. Life coaching is founded on the belief that people know the answers to their own questions. If you are on a journey blindfolded, you and you alone can take the covering off your eyes; and so they incite you to discover your life’s purpose may it be in relationships, career and everything else in life.

Experts Of Life

Most people ask if life coaches are experts in life. Of course they are; they are experts in their own lives. You see a life coach does tell you what to do, because that’s what they did to make their own lives successful. Every person is different; every way of life has their own variations. We are the authority, the only qualified person to make decisions and suggestions regarding how to better our lives emotionally and psychologically.

We may not know it, but we have the power to recognize which key decisions in our lives are best for us. Every day we make trivial choices that although we might not realize it at first these decisions actually have a great impact in our lives. Life coaches can help us realize certain aspects of our lives, and then provoke us into action to make life more fulfilling.

Making Life Work

There have always been these standing rules that we should segregate our brain from our heart from making decisions. What others fail to realize is that when the heart is connected to the brain, we make better resolutions.

Life coaching is often used by fortune 500 companies to keep their employees focused and content. People at the top of their game are coached so why shouldn’t we be? A chauffer is no different from a company CEO is a sense that both serve their purpose in society. The question is the two happy with the path they have chosen? Life has many facets to contend with. Pinpointing these areas and dealing with them effectively takes a lot of soul searching and nothing’s wrong with a little urging.

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Life Coaching is all the rage. Improving oneself is in and a medical definition of your problem is not so great to hear. The Life Coaching profession in America is booming. Therapist out life coaches in.

What Does A Life Coach Do

Generally speaking a life coach helps people empower themselves by learning to recognize key things about one’s feelings and thinking. There are a lot of discontented people in America and they would to get their lives revamped. The problem with this profession is that it is yet to be regulated and a formal set of education has not been established.

A life coach in unlike therapists because they do not rescue the deeply depressed they only wish to guide people whose lives are only slightly askew. In short life coaches are someone you work with in order to set your goals straight and for you to follow those goals. Life coaches do not delve on the past history of client’s life. Instead they tackle today and the future.

Who Get Coached?

For those macho men who hate getting into the emotional stuff life coaching is extremely popular. What’s more, because life coaching takes on a sports persona kids and families in general respond better to the programs. Life coaching is not all about talking, a guide gives certain activities where in there is equal cooperation.

The Downside of the Matter

The problem with life coaching is that it is an unregulated profession. Although a lot of life coaches have trainings and education regarding this field, still a number remains undisciplined in this arena. The life coaching profession has no basis for qualification, no unified approach as to what makes a life coach a life coach. Most of the guiding practices are unproven and no extensive studies have been done.

These unproven methods pose a certain risk because life coaches are not equipped to recognize if their clients have serious mental illness and therefore will have to see the appropriate physician. The guide might put him/herself and the client in danger.

The need for a cheerleader, a planner, a sort of life secretary if you will is a good premise, but what people really need is more than that. What if the life coach fails to see the signals that a certain person is not only in need of a pick me up but is actually in serious trouble? Experts are getting wary, they want mental professional to enter the field of life coaching because they are better able to analyze a person’s psyche and actually deliver the appropriate needs.

In the past, life coaching was used as a business motivational tool. Human resources see that high powered executives do get restless and might want to evaluate their lives. Life coaches are used to help those worried individuals see reality and appreciate what they have while going after what they are passionate for.

In Closing

Unlike popular belief, life coaching is not a quick fix. The session can take months and months of activities in order to really see ones self clearly in connection to reality. Life coaching is interactive, it is positive, it moves forward. These are the reasons why life coaching is actually good for people. The emphasis however is on whether a life coach is qualified to be one or not.

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A lot of people give themselves good advice and not following these very advices which may help save themselves from problems. Another problem we have is giving unsolicited advices without even knowing the true facts of the situation.

A Low Down On Advices

All roads are paved with good intentions. A lot of people want to help, we want to aid people by shielding them and deflective bad things, and especially to those people we love. An advice can turn something good into somewhat of an overture towards a person’s sense of self. One comment can become a potentially uncomfortable situation.

Some people are sensitive. You may see them cry, they might tell you they are hurt, and they could say something as to the why, however the fact remains that you do not have enough idea of the situation that person is in. More often than not, people who love dishing out advice end up putting their foot into their mouths.

Empathy and Sympathy

Taking your cue from a life coach, you will see that a life coach never sympathizes with their client. Sympathizing is taking another persons experience and making them your own. That is a selfish act. Empathizing on the other hand is putting yourself in that individual’s shoes. In short being him/ her for the time being.

Visualize and Categorize

Advices are useless because they can be one sided. Every person’s experiences are different. You may have the same problem, but the process you had to go through before reaching that problem always varies.

Letting the client visualize the goal is the first step towards healing and finding the solution. For example: If the problem is an argument with the boss. Making the client visualize his desired out come, let say making up with the boss and getting a promotion will point the client to the path in which he wants to take without dictating him to do. You see, sometimes advices can be dictatory in a sense that the other person will follow the advice simply because they do not want to hurt your feelings.

If Not Advice Then What?

Time is the essence of life coaching. A coach can spend months and some even years working with a client to achieve his goals and the things he wants in life. Time is valuable so make the most of it by connecting with the client mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Achieving a degree of trust is usually the first step. Next is listening intently, and then identifying critical situation in a client’s life which you could catalyze on to make though provoking activities for your client.

The thing about being a life coach is that although you do relate to the client from a time to time basis, you give the client room to expand and be who he really is without having to worry of what your thinking. An advice is not how a life coach makes the client see things. Instead the coach praises the client for his current success and asks him if there is anything in his life he wants to change. By asking a question the coach throws the ball to the client’s court and makes him ponder on his own. The process of life coaching is not an easy one. There are trainings and seminars, but there is no formal education. You have to possess insight to be an effective life coach.

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Some human resource personnel wonder why fortune 500 companies have one of the best executives in the country. What they don’t know is that top businesses have been using a secret weapon for years now. Justifying the Need for a Coach People think that just because you’re successful, and in a high ranking position with a ridiculously large amount of salary, you’re happy. What they fail to realize is that the bigger the wage, the more elevated the post, the greater the responsibility. What’s even more difficult in this situation is that an executive has to smile and bear it even if their heads are exploding with all the problems, and complications they have to handle. Seeking support is not a sign of weakness, instead in strength because it takes a lot of courage to admit that “no man is an island”. High Rise Pressure Cooker A ranking company officer is expected to perform well, and to deserve the designation given to him/ her. People below and above you bank on your leadership abilities, skills, and excellent decisions. They will continually expect that you will always be the best. In fact you will be called upon to speak in behalf of the company; to give advices on success, business and marketing strategies, and how to handle complex dilemmas. All these and more is expected of you. It is presumed that you handle your professional and personal life in manner of unequaled grace. Personal and Emotional stress Quite naturally there may be times when all you want to do is hide underneath the sheets and be invisible. Unfortunately if you are one of those people who set high standards for other people and an even higher one for yourself, then hiding is not an option. Putting pressure on oneself is not uncommon. Many people who achieve a great level of accomplishment are there not because they give themselves a pat on the back when they do something right. Instead, they are on top because every time they triumph they dissect the situation and look for ways to do things better. The downside to being good at what you do is that despite reaching far more than the expectations of others, most achievers never seem to be contented of their performance. Hence, these people fail to see the flowers that bloom from the roses they have planted. A superior executive coach will recognize all these and help draw out the client. Putting the pressures in a different aspect will help the client see things in a different perspective. Life Coaching Benefits The benefits of life coaching cannot be measured. Employing a life coach is like having a friend to talk to and a guidance counselor all rolled into one. Life coaching makes you feel interactive, and open without having to delve in the past. The present and the future is what matters the most. A life coach is a professional listener who helps people internalize and realize their wants and needs to better set goals and maintain a sense of self without having to change careers and antagonize family. It is a sure bet that you probably needed a friend one time or the other but was too afraid of being judged and later betrayed. A life coach is duty bound to be professional in handling all confidential matters. Life coaching is a synergy between client coaches.

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